When my hair was relaxed, I was approached by Black men and non-Black men in about the same ratio. First and foremost, I now get approached more by non-Black men than Black men. I smiled and after a few minutes, he came over to talk. We talked and mildly flirted. And just like the many White guys before him, he seemed attracted but then sheepishly asked: "Can I get your number?
Below are some of the changes we know you had to get used to from dating a natural-hair woman. Shayna Watson is a freelance style and beauty writer who can Author: Shayna Watson. Oct 18, † Natural hair is a process and the journey begins when you decide to take control of your life and decide who you are and what you want. I suggest with dating and natural hair the first step is to have him define what beauty is, from his definition you'll know if he is the guy for you or if its best to keep it moving. Aug 16, † I have sooo many friends who are natural and have married or are dating white men. So white men are attracted to black women and their natural hair. I married an African man who loves my natural hair. I think that it's more Black American men who like the straight stuff. August 16, at AM BluJay said.
Yes this is so true, I really have lost count of how many men of different races have stared me up and down, but the brotha's like it too: I wasn't open to dating men of different races, but now i'm open. I just felt like he would never fully understand me, idk maybe thats just me. But when all is said and done you should be with a person who loves all of younot just your hair.
Loving me naturally:. Um anon if you think that the post is "heterocentric" it's because the poster is. That's unfair and fantasy based to assume that there's some kind of discrimination.
Perhaps you may want to send a post in to this blog. I do believe that CN has opportunities for guest bloggers. Oh and don't do it anonymously, be proud!
My boyfriend is white and I can't tell you enough how much he likes my hair. I don't have anything against black man, they just slowly stop approaching me since I went natural. Like one of the ladies here said, 'oh well'as long as I am happy, nothing else matters, life goes on! After a while I noticed the white guys taking a look at me but to be honest since I started wearing my natural hair older men are more attracted to me period.
I think that the black men are not as attracted to me now, I have not been approached since, I've heard negative comments about it, but it doesn't bother me one bit because I love it whether they do or not. The white guys have always been into me relaxed or natural hair, I guess it depends on how you carry yourself.
My confidence has skyrocketed since going back to my natural hair! I have noticed since being natural,all men notice and black men are telling me they love it and wish more women would do it.
I even had several stop and ask to run their hands through something they would not have dared do if I had relaxed hair. I think natural hair appeal is fun and carefree to men.
Well, I'm too young to be getting approached by men of any sort.
But because of where I live and the school I go to, there are hardly any black boys. So when people have their hands in my hair, there usually Caucasian.
Dating With Natural Hair: What Could Go Wrong?
One thing I don't understand though, is not dating out of your race. You can learn so many things if you open yourself up to something different. I'm married to a white man who loves my natural hair. I have never, and I mean never gotten a compliment on my natural hair from a black man. That has been my experience, so far. For the longest time, I thought that they wouldn't be attracted to me because I'm black.
This was soo wrong. My first boyfriend was white.
Natural hair and dating
I've been approached by black men, but most of them just wanted to hit it and quit it. Now there are white and non-white men that have this same mentality. I seem to attract the white men, I'm sure that they're loving my looks, but I do also think it's because we tend to have common ground.
It's a great book to get. It goes over some of these topics brought up in this discussion. Overall, do what makes you happy, try not to be closed minded. Love knows no color. I notice that I get approached by more mature men, usually to 40 and up I'm I don't get more compliments or advances from white men and that's fine because I don't date white men.
Black men give me compliments on my hair all of the time. I find that since wearing my hair natural men give me more respect. Why do we care what men think of our hair? Hair doesn't make a relationship and men approach you if you seem approachable and confident. It also seems that the natural hair sites are obsessed with non-black men, why? Dating criteria shouldn't be based on race it should be based on values and trust, neither of which can be determined by race.
For folks who keep saying that "Why do we care what men think of our hair?
Men Of Means Donít Like Natural Hair? - Tips To Attract High Caliber Men With Your Natural Hair
Would you marry, get involved, or even be friends with someone who hated your natural hair. To act like we are soooo independent and "secure" as Natural Black women, that we don't want to feel loved and attractive is delusional. I don't think it makes us weak to want to know what the opposite sex thinks and it obviously doesn't dictate what we do to our hair or we would have stuck with the relaxers. My dating life sucked when I had permed hair and it hasn't improved at all since I've gone natural.
Black, Hispanic, White, or any other races barely approach me, they will look but dont say anything My point was that there is so much more to dating than hair. Attractiveness is more than hair, it is confidence and the way you present yourself face, body etc. Obviously they are going to be men that don't find you attractive or that dislike your style choices but why would you worry about them?
Not every man can fancy you, like you don't fancy every man. Plus unless a man tells you they don't fancy you because of your hair how would you know?
I just think that because hair is so important to the ladies that frequent hair sites we over analyse the importance of hair when people in the real world don't actually care as much as we think they do. Sure I've notice some changes since going natural.
More compliments about my hair from white people in general Maybe like most have said Got more interesting looks and flirtatous vibes from other men of the Hispanic culture. More of my taste!
Mar 10, † Dating With Natural Hair: What Could Go Wrong? Natural Hair We know as naturalistas it can be extremely difficult dating with natural hair especially if it is a newly found love, or even worse a FIRST DATE! May 05, † Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States About Blog Black Naps is a leading provider of natural hair tips and style. In , Ariane created Black Naps to blog about my natural hair journey and to share helpful tips with others. Black Naps was created to show women that they can be beautiful while staying true to themselves. Frequency 2 posts.
I still recieve attention from black men but not as much Oh, and the older men seem to like it too Interesting topic as I was just pondering it the other day. For the vast majority of my dating life I have worn my hair in weaves, braids, wigs, or pressed.
Now thanks to my daughter, who has inspired me to wear my natural hair, I finally mustered the courage to do so last month. Although somewhat timid, the freedom I now have I would never trade : Certainly have noticed more non-black men looking my way since the switch.
However, it is welcomed since I am open to dating any race. But for some odd reason I wondered if men would stop looking my way because of the switch I believe that they can appreciate something totally different than the mainstream.
Newsflash for the most part they aren't hung up on natural hair - it's some of US that have the hang ups. So let's keep rockin' what is unique to us, and let's let these men admire our beauty :.
A white guy smiles at me going up on the other side. I am walking to my car and seconds later I feel someone touch my elbow. I jump up startled.
It's the white guy, but he's unglued. This guy looks like somebody's new husband Early 30's handsome brad pitt like. Guess what?
He was. He says, "I'm married, but you're He's having a melt down. I hug him, more out of mercy, but not out of desire.
The hug was intense, but I exit. Hair was freshly done, but lord knows they LOVE us either way. They are just more timid about showing it. Well I've always been approached by men of all races when my hair was relaxed, actually less so from black men. Everyone I met always thought I was mexican or south east asian or some other ethnic group.
When I went natural I got more approaches from black men. Now that I am natural I have noticed that more black men are checking me out. I have always been approched by white and hispanic men more than black men before I became natural.
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He would always tell me to stop relaxing. When I finally decided to go natural and cut it all off he was shocked, but he loved it. He loves to play in my hair. Sometimes he tries to give me crazy hairsyles. I am natural now but met my white husband while relaxed. He loves it when I wear my fro or rock a weave. As India Arie said, I am not my hair. I dont really care what race approaches me, I accept it all. Ladies love your hair and all the attention it gets!!!
Both Black and White men have been socialized to preceieve Black women a certain way. For white men too have been socialized and it seems this is to think black women as exotic, especially when natural. After all, in veiwing a magazine, black women were primarily shown looking very natural, earthy and strong.
Perhaps these images play their parts in presenting a certain mindset.
This is a very interesting blog. I have been natural for almost ten years and before I locked my hair, I wore braids. Nobody including myself knew what i was going to do with it. I was working in an after-school program within a diverse population. I will never forget the reaction from the children I worked with when I showed them my baby twists. The boys really gave no reaction. The black girls hated it, and the white girls thought it was "really cool". At that time, I was living in Virginia.
In the South, the people are known for being partial to long hair and light skin. This is true, but I was approached more, even by black men, when I lived in Virginia; however, I noticed that most of the men i dated thought of me as just the dating type, not the relationship type. Three years ago, I moved back to NJ and have not really had too many men approach me at all. It may be due to my new "mommy persona" I was pregnant when i moved to Va I have been natural for almost two years now.
I typically wear braid outs or WnGs. The reactions I have received are very similar. Sadly, I have been approached more by non-blacks than black men. Many of my black male friends questioned my transition negatively and couldn't understand why I chose to cut my thinning, mid back length hair to a short natural afro.
I have also noticed that if I wear extensions or braids ocassionally, it is more acceptable in their eyes. My current boyfriend is white and adores my hair.
When I told him I was going to get braids, he sighed and asked could he play in my hair all night before it was too late. He even began to use more natural products such as olive oil on his biracial daughter's hair because he said, if it is good enough for his "big" baby why not for his "little" baby too.
When will our men truly embrace the beauty of our natural glory God has given us and not forsake us because it isn't a measurement of the European standard of beauty? Be blessed and lovely, ladies This is a little off topic but not really. I really love the girl's hair in the featured pic. Is that just two strand twists or some other type of twists with extentions.
Please let me know! Has he ever dated a woman with natural hair? Yes, hair is just hair but it is an external part of my identity as a black woman. Honestly, I still do not feel that natural hair has become social acceptable and has not become a wow factor for most black men today. Most of us still walk around with t his slavery mentality that can easily take you back to where you once were, feeling that your hair isnt good enough because it no longer fit the Euoproen standards of beauty.
I believe this is a conversation that needs to be had in a new relationship because you might take much pride and enjoyment in your coils but he might not like it and yes you might say is not for him to like.
Yes, I agree but it is a vital part of the dating process getting to know if you are compatible and or compliment one another. I wanted him to appreciate my hair as much as I do. I have the power to control his feelings and reaction towards my hair, based on the enegery I give off. My goal is to enlighten him and know that however I choose to wear my hair should be no concern of his and if it is a problem then you are just not the guy for me.
Natural hair is a process and the journey begins when you decide to take control of your life and decide who you are and what you want. Amma Mama October 20, at pm. Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published.